The One Promise You're Breaking That’s Secretly Draining Your Energy

Why Keeping My Word to Myself Changed Everything

One of my favorite books of all time is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. The very first agreement—Be Impeccable with Your Word—is one I come back to again and again. It’s also my #1 recommendation when someone is ready to shift their life.

But let’s be real—sometimes that phrase can feel a little formal or intimidating, especially when we’re just trying to survive the week. So I like to make it personal. For me, it means: Can I trust myself to follow through? Am I showing up for myself the way I show up for everyone else? That’s where the real work starts.

I’m usually super reliable when it comes to other people—my family, my friends, my clients. But for a long time, I had a habit of bailing on me. Skipping the walk I said I’d take. Ignoring the boundary I swore I’d hold. Putting off the thing I promised myself I’d do “as soon as I had time.” And while that might not seem like a big deal in the moment, it added up. I didn’t trust my own voice anymore—and honestly, I felt a little lost.

Here’s what I’ve learned: when I started keeping my word to myself, things shifted—my mindset, my energy, my confidence. Not overnight, but gradually and powerfully.

• 🧠 I built self-trust. I started to believe I had my own back

  
  

• 💪🏽 I felt more confident. Each small follow-through reminded me I was capable

  
  

• 🎯 I got clear on my values. I stopped saying yes to what didn’t align

  
  

• 🧘🏾‍♀️ I protected my energy. When I kept my promises to me, I had more to give others

  
  

• ✨ I felt more grounded. Not because life got easier—but because I showed up differently

  
  

I still love the phrase Be Impeccable with Your Word—but I also use others that feel more down-to-earth:

• Keeping promises to myself

• Showing up for myself

• Following through (even just a little)

• Not ghosting myself (yeah, I said it 😅)

• Honoring what matters to me

  
  

Journal prompts to explore this more deeply:

• Where in my life am I keeping my word to others but breaking it with myself?

• What’s one small promise I could make—and actually keep—for myself this week?